Sandier Pastures

I’m still on vacation. Enjoy this week’s joke:

***** 

An 18 year old girl tells her mum that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the Chemist and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant.

Shouting, cursing and crying, the mother says, “Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!”

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call.

Half hour later and a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with grey hair impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the Ferrari and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, mother and the girl and tells them “Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can’t marry her because of my personal family situation but I’ll take charge. I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life.

Additionally, if a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beachfront villa and a £2million bank account.

If a boy is born my legacy will be a couple of factories and a £4,000,000 bank account.

If twins they will receive a factory and £2,000,000 each.

However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?”

At this point, the girls father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man’s shoulder and tells him, “You shag her again.”

Like I needed a big shove from underground to come back from my blogging hiatus, there was an earthquake in Tokyo today, right when Pristine and I were out shopping at 2 pm. The ground shook and I felt it. I looked around, some people felt it too…we all just looked at each other. Underground train? No, because we are in Tachikawa and there are no subway stations below us!

Where’s Pristine?? She walked away to see some toys while I paid stuffs in the cashier. I left the counter and quickly grabbed my daughter and ran outside. We hurriedly went to get the train home and then I got a phone call from my husband who just arrived from Dubai saying his train stopped just before Tachikawa. The train I used was the last one to leave the station. Public transport personnel are checking the tracks and the train schedules are having really bad delays right now.

Have to end posting now, gotta look for alternative transport going to the airport. We are leaving for Manila tomorrow (to attend a wedding next week). I hope the quake was just one of those minor ones I have experienced in Japan.

***** UPDATE *****

The trains started running after less than an hour. Thankfully, the quake was not the “big one” that is predicted to happen in Tokyo so I guess it was just another of those several shaking ground phenomenon this earthquake prone country faces from time to time. It was still scary though as it felt like rocks rolling under my shoes.