Just when I was thinking what to write for Week 10, an opportune moment presented itself: someone at the gym criticized me for the things I do!
Right in front of my face, complete with body gestures like shaking head, flailing hands in the tune of “whatever!” and a pair of eyes looking at me like I have two heads. In a very thick accent she came up and bitched blasted me:
“I don’t know why you keep on lifting weights this heavy!”
She was referring to the pair of 6-8 kg dumbells I am using for most of my arm/shoulder exercises.
“It doesn’t do you anything. In fact, it will just make you grow man muscles that are ugly and WON’T help you lose fat at all!”
Can someone remove this lady in front of me? Anyone? I was about to shout, but I didn’t. It’s her opinion and I doubt if I make a spat with her there that it would stop her from suggesting to me that I use the pink dumbells instead.
Man muscles? Oh yes, please. I kind of like to become The Hulk and green is not a bad color. NOT! (As per my reading, lifting heavy weights won’t bulk up women because we simply don’t have the hormones that men have. Unless of course we use steroids then we’ll look like a walking human anatomy.)
“Lower weights, high repetition is the key! 2-5 lb dumbells, 50 times. TRUST me!”
I wasn’t exactly face to face with Miss Universe or Jillian Michaels.
Not even close. And trust? Ah, such a heavy word. Why should I trust her!? To give a brief description of the nosy lady: she’s around 40, paper-thin, skin clinging to bones thin, makes people think what-the-hell-is-she-doing-at-the-gym thin, with a very bad posture and stinking with cigarrette smell. The only thing I find good in her is that she must have lower body fat percentage than I do (I was able to count her ribs when I saw her naked in the changing room). That’s about it. Otherwise, I don’t trust her at all and I won’t trade the current DB’s I am using to her pink ones. No way!
“Those heavy weights do NOT burn fat at all!”, she says.
But what was the 10 lbs I LOST since starting the Turbulence Training program (that included lifting weights heavier than the pink dumbells) these past 10 weeks? Surely it was not JUST sweat or water or whatever it was inside me! And uhm, no, I did not give birth recently so what I lost was not amniotic fluid and baby blob.
I just rolled my eyes and crinkled my nose (I hate cigarrette smell!) as she swept past me.
“And also, why are you doing pushups? Those are just for men!”
Clearly, she wasn’t finished with her lecture yet.
*****
Which works best, high weight-low reps or low weight-high reps? I could write a really long article about it but it will just hurt your eyes. It’s not good to hurt your eyes on weekends. Google it though, if you’re curious but me, I have made a choice and sticking to what works for me.
What would you do if someone criticizes the things you do at the gym? or do you have any suggestions what I’ll tell her the next time she comes up to me and offer her pink dumbells?
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There is never a fear that someone could criticize me at the gym, don’t go near that evil place…lol.
“In fact, it will just make you grow man muscles that are ugly and WON’T help you lose fat at all!”
lol…I don’t know what this lady is afraid of. Sounds like you lifting bigger weights triggered some fear of hers. Maybe she is anorexic and she is afraid that your man muscles might be catchy.
I love reading your blog. It makes me laugh.
I can’t let the anorexic woman stop me from going to the gym although I admit, I am affected because I wasn’t able to bitch back.
Thanks for the comment, Connie. Glad my blog entertained you.
Connie Walshs last blog post..Melinda Joy is giving away a Subjective Beauty Blog Makeover Aug 1
I think I’d tell her that I was very happy she found a workout she liked and one that worked for her but I really don’t need advice, thank you. I’d then proceed to question her about defeating all she’s doing by smoking, etc., I’d just keep giving her so much “advice” that she stayed clear of me.
If I wanted to go to the gym and lay on the floor and read magazines, I’d do it.
Oh maybe you DON’T need to go to the gym at all while I really need to.
I wish to develop my bitching back skills so I won’t feel defeated next time. Such unsexy feeling.
mannequins last blog post..The Suitcase
Oh wow, Grace! I think in that situation, I’d just say, “oh wow, if only it were that easy. I’d love to have big bulky muscles!” If she persisted, I’d say, “thanks so much for your concern, but my personal trainer and I are happy with my program and my progress. If I want a second opinion, I’ll go to an expert.”
I should just point her out to you, your story and your awesome photos (results of TT and heavier weights), Liz!
What nerve! Keep going with those big heavy weights.
Lizs last blog post..Vacation workout plan
I have had something like this before happen to me >.< so irritating! Basically after the 5th time of just nicely dropping hints thanks but you're not trainer and last time I checked in case you're blind i've dropped 35lbs since you started telling me what i'm doing is wrong. Finally one of the other members got so sick of hearing her and I guess felt bad came over told her to mind her own business and if she knew so much about what I was doing wrong become a trainer herself and WAIT for people to pay her for her help and opinion. Nope didn't stop there so finally I talked to my trainer and was like dude I love this gym and everyone here except one annoying person so could we change time. LOL apparently my trainer ripped a new one into her and she FINALLY got the hint.
It's sad when you have someone that's a complete stubborn know it all. Especially when in my case the lady has never been overweight in her life and here I have been most of my life and lost 105lbs on my own just fine. I'm not say I don't welcome advice especially from someone who has been in shape and slender all their life. However when they're in your face non stop and just won't shut up how they're right and your wrong it's just got to end. During the madness I laughed so hard to hide my frustration I thought one of the dumbbells was going to knock the lady over LOL.
Keep on doing your thing and don't let people bother you, it's hard because I get in a zone when i'm working out so once people break the bubble ahhh snap now i'm just off on my workouts haha. Best of luck to you
Yeah, I loved the gym I am going and don’t want to be discouraged to exercise just because of lady skeletor preaching for free.
>> if she knew so much about what I was doing wrong become a trainer herself and WAIT for people to pay her for her help and opinion
Oh I wish I could say this right up!
Low weight with high repetition is good for toning and fat burn. That’s been the general consensus among fitness experts for years, and that’s what I did for years.
I found what works for me..heavier weights where I can only do 8-10 reps. I’m glad you found what worked for you.
But you have to know that no matter how we develop our muscles, if we have a layer of fat over them, it will never show. We will never have Michelle Obama’s arms…by “you” of course I am referring to myself.
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How rude of her to tell you what to do or not to do in the gym. Obviously she is ignorant too. If someone told me that I was wasting my time doing Turbulence Training I would just refer them to http://www.transformationcontest.com. The proof is in the results. The program works! I am currently on a mass gain for TC #5 (I am larmer on the forums BTW). The training manager at my gym has looked at my TT for Meatheads program and he said that it is a very smart program.
I must admit there are times at the gym I want to shake my head at what some people do but I do not. To do so would be rude. BTW well done losing 10 lbs in 12 weeks. That is great.
Thanks Andrew! I’ve been in and out of the gym but for the first time in my fitness life, I found something that works in the Turbulence Training program. I am sticking to it, no matter what other people say!
By the way, I am “sandierpastures” in the TT members forums.
who was she to know what your fitness goals might be! that’s none of her business. assuming that your fitness regime is ineffective is assuming a whole lot about what you’re trying to do in the first place, which is incredibly presumptious.
you should do what helps you feel good, whatever that may be. and it sounds like you’re doing it. if you want to efficiently burn fat and build muscle as well as possible…well, there’s plenty of opinions on how to do that. and each is valid in some ways, so pick whichever feels right!
i used to be a fitness fanatic, and loved low weights with high repetition. i also loved those “the firm” tapes that alternated cardio with weight training. the videos were from years and years ago, but i loved that the instructor was my body type–muscular without being overly skinny or lacking a bosom!
You said all the things that I wanted to say in this post!! Thank you.
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if she confronts you in the future, you should tell her something like this: much as you appreciate her concern for your fitness, you prefer not to socialize/talk while you’re at the gym. working out gives you time to focus on yourself away from a hectic home life, and you need the personal space for that.
I’m here, nodding at all the words you wrote. My gym time is my personal. quite time. I don’t socialize with people in the gym because I don’t have the time. Duh, I am working out in my one-hour lunch break! That lady wasted a good 10 minutes of my time with her “lecture”.
JuliaAs last blog post..blue silver
I think you have it right – “None of your business” would be my response!
I just wish I am quick to say those words next time. I lack the speed and the courage and hate myself for it.
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I’m so non-confrontational that I’m not sure what I would do. However, I have been known to put people in their place at times. I guess it depends on my mood that day.
Sometimes I hate myself for being so non-confrontational. Some situations need “bitching back” and I can’t.
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Wow, sounds like an oh so charming(and I say charming with heavy sarcasm) lady *rolls eyes*
That is the times you just nod your head, say thanks and continue what you were doing.
My sister’s boyfriend likes to work out a lot and he says heavy weights plus less reps equal muscle and light weights plus multiple reps equals more endurance.
Hopefully that helps a little bit. Lol
Thanks for that Kayla! I found out what worked for me..heavier weights done in 8-10 reps. I am not showing big man muscles, will show a pic in later post.
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Tell her you like the muscle look (even if you don’t) because you don’t want to look like Skelator with dry skin hanging off you like a dried off corpse. Then give her a wink. Ha!
A good one Bella! Now if only I can find the courage to say that!!
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I think you should just thank her for her advice but let her know you know what you are doing. I have never had this happen before at the gym but I do have an over-eager friend and I just ignore him lol
What you said about the Hulk was so funny, Grace! You are doing the right thing with the weights. I have read the same thing, that it is almost impossible for ladies to bulk up because of the hormone issue.
Joyce T.s last blog post..Ah, A Sailor’s Life for Me!
Oh, just throw the thing at her!!
Don’t you wish you could really do that sometimes????
Just say thank you and turn around… she’ll eventually get the hint if you keep turning your back on her. (I’d still like to throw the DB at her…. if she doesn’t get the hint…. maybe when she’s naked in the locker room, from the sound of her, she probably wont be able to catch it?!?!?!)
You are so funny, Lorie!! Yes, I highly doubt she would be able to catch the DB. Seriously, that’s what I did – said thank you and turned around to continue doing my thing. Great – no blood spilled but something still feels not right.
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you don’t need to bitch back. just give a series of ‘oh, yeah’, and ‘really?!’ responses and ask a lot of questions about herself, turn the table on her. you’ll be amazed to learn that all she really wanted to do is talk about herself and her pathetic life. you’ll learn things about her that will make you feel better about yourself and feel even more sorry for her.
always works for me. i’m sure it’ll work for you too.
i think you’re doing great working out. keep it up!
OMG! You told me about this encounter but it still makes me mad after I read it again here in your blog.
I wish I can see this lady and start doing Squats in front of her with 125 lbs and pull ups => I would like to see what she says then…lol.
It’s good that you recognize the importance of strength/weight training. I wish all women do.
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even easier response: “sorry, i don’t have time to talk about different workout methods–my lunch break is too short!”
i know how it feels to be non-confrontational. sometimes it helps to brainstorm things that might not say *exactly* what you want to say (this is none of your business!), but that get the point across. (stop talking to me!)
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oh my word, I’ve never seen someone at the gym be so vocally critical..most people just think snarky things to themselves! Personally, I would say hey I’m working out right and my body feels good..soo thanks for your opinion, but you are ruining my rather pleasant workout!
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Gotta love people who try to mind your own business for you. I generally stick with 15 pound dumbbells for shoulder work and 30 pound dumbbells for arm curls myself – you find what works for you and then you make it happen. Sorry you had to deal with that!!
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Just make sure you include those darling lace gloves you were showing off to Josef Rakich and I WILL rep you for supreme fashion sense!
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